Dear Awful

Dear WendyK,

I am so confused. I am an “older” bride, but it is my first marriage. I want a traditional wedding – complete with bridesmaids and groomsmen. This is my fiancés second marriage and has two grown daughters. My problem is that I really don’t want them as bridesmaids in my bridal party. We are not on the best of terms.

Am I Awful?

Dear Am I Awful,

Well —– maybe a little. You love your fiancé, correct? You plan to be together for the rest of your lives, correct? If you ask your future stepdaughters to be in your bridal party, it will not only please your fiancé, it just might be the perfect act of kindness to change your entire relationship with these girls. You can ask them to either be part of your bridal party, or if your fiance’s parents are deceased, they can escort their dad down the aisle.
When I choreograph a wedding ceremony I am respectful of tradition, but I also customize the procession to reflect the personality and dynamics of the bride and groom.
And —— if the girls say “NO” – you will still be a hero because you did the correct and thoughtful thing. Let me know what happens.